its been a month and 2 days since ben and me were no more
i still want him to fall over and seriously hurt himself. is that mean and bitter? i don't care. i still hurt. the twat.
have started knittin a hoody for my dolly. i am soooooooo sad. i've gone from a fun, socialable, party lovin gal to a sad, tea total, loner who has to knit and sew everynight, not for enjoyment like she use to. but to stop herself from cryin and drinkin her liver dry. i can't fully blame ben, as it is my fault as well, but my god, i am shovin a lot of his shoulders. the one person who has kept me goin and sorta sane has buggered off travelin til march. that's a long time to cope on my own. but i must.
i'm goin to create a sewn piece of how i feel bout the twat. obviously i have to finish the piece i'm already doin. i shall go do some now!!